The Ice (Cream) Man Cometh

So, to tell you this little story, I need to tell you the events of a few months (well, almost a year) ago (as I type, I've missed half of Shameless... fook). It was mid May, I think. Should have been because I was revising for my forthcoming PE exams. Anyway, I only really noticed at that time, but for a whole month (and till the end of August) there was an ice cream man driving pst my house, blaring out his shite tinny version of 'Yankee Doodle'. He wasn't stopping. At least, I should think not, as my road's fairly busy. But I digress.

Anyway, this happened twice every day, on his way round and his way back. A few months later, before we finished Year 12 after the exams, I was sat in double English on a Tuesday afternoon. What should I hear about half an hour before the end of school? Yankee bastard Doodle. I saw him (quite shocked, to be honest. My family tried to tell me that he didn't exist, and I was beginning to believe them. The swines told me later they were taking the piss.) when I was walking home. As I was giving him a dirty look, I realised he was an Asian fella, so I promptly stopped. He'd have seen it as a random white sixth former giving him dirty looks. Lord knows if 'Baa Baa Black Sheep' is racist, then giving a random Asian fella the evils is. Even if he's harassed me for 3 months.


Anyway, I bring that up, because a few days ago, I was minding me own business, dodging work. I sit there, listening to music. Miserable day, wasn't raining so long ago. And then, as I opened Word to start to type up my notes for RS, what should I hear? Yankee bastard tosspot cunting shithouse arsehole Doodle. Who the fuck wants ice cream at the start of bastard March? WHO? WHO?! Honest to God, who?

Fury, mild irritance, annoyance, confusion. It conveys a lot of emotions.


Insert Witty Title Here - bringing you nostalgia since 1009. (badum tsh)